Leading Through Adversity: How My Darkest Day Shaped My Purpose
The Turning Point
Every leader experiences a turning point—a defining moment that reshapes their perspective, priorities, and path. These moments often arise from unexpected, challenging situations that demand an immediate response and leave a lasting impression. For me, that pivotal day came on November 12, 2016, during my deployment at Bagram Air Base in Afghanistan.
This wasn’t just any turning point. It was born out of chaos, loss, and tragedy. Yet, from that darkness, something powerful and purposeful emerged. This article, albeit tough for me to write just as it was to recount this story in my book From Functional to Phenomenal, isn’t about recounting a difficult story—it’s about highlighting what we as leaders can learn from adversity and how these lessons can transform us, both personally and professionally.
Just Another Morning
It started as a typical morning at Bagram Air Base. The air was crisp and clear, unusually warm for a November morning, perfect for our regular predawn 5k run. These runs weren’t just about fitness—they were moments of camaraderie and relief amid the stress of deployment. Soldiers laughed, chatted, and prepared to start the day on a positive note.
As the group gathered, I suddenly realized I had forgotten my safety glasses. Knowing that running without them meant sand in my eyes or difficulty with the glaring sun, I quickly ran back to the barracks. It seemed inconsequential at the time, just a minor inconvenience.
Yet, within minutes, that slight delay likely saved my life.
Chaos Erupts: Responding to Crisis
As I hurried back toward the group, a thunderous explosion tore through the peaceful morning, echoing across the base. Confusion was immediate—was it another accident involving a waste truck tipping over, as had happened recently? Then, reality struck: people were screaming, smoke filled the air, and people were frantically running toward safety, away from the explosion.
In that split second, instinct and training took over. In the Army, we’re taught: “Mission first.” No matter your official role, your primary responsibility in crisis is clear—respond quickly and decisively. So, without hesitation, I ran toward the chaos, not away.
The scene awaiting me was devastating. People were sprawled on the ground, injured and disoriented. The peaceful run site had become a battlefield in mere seconds. Blood and debris marked the aftermath of the explosion. Yet amid this horror, clarity emerged: I knew exactly what I had to do.
Training kicked in, guiding me to triage the injured, comfort them, and quickly transport them to the hospital. There was no time for fear or panic—only decisive, compassionate action.
The Aftermath: Loss, Reflection, and Growth
Tragically, we lost six lives that day. Among those lost was a young soldier I had personally been mentoring, a man eager to build a career in cybersecurity. Our last conversation, filled with laughter and casual banter about fitness routines, suddenly became profoundly significant in retrospect. This was no longer just another conversation but a stark reminder of life’s fragility.
The days, weeks, and months following the incident were difficult. While physically uninjured, I carried the heavy burden of survivor’s guilt, grief, and emotional turmoil. Therapy became essential, guiding me through healing and recovery.
But from this darkness emerged unexpected clarity—a new awareness of my deeper purpose. Through my struggle to heal, I uncovered a powerful realization: I was not defined by what happened to me but by how I chose to respond.
Three Essential Leadership Lessons from Adversity
Reflecting on this experience, I distilled three critical lessons about leadership, resilience, and personal growth that I carry forward in everything I do today:
1. Resilience Is Forged in Adversity
Resilience is how we respond when facing the most challenging moments. Adversity strips away our comforts and routines, revealing our true strength. Leaders who encounter and overcome adversity learn to see challenges differently—not as setbacks but as essential stepping stones in building strength, wisdom, and emotional intelligence.
My experience taught me that resilience comes from facing situations we never wanted but had to endure. Through this lens, adversity becomes an influential teacher, sharpening our instincts and deepening our capacity to lead.
2. Purpose Emerges Through Reflection
Painful experiences compel us to reflect deeply. During therapy and introspection after the bombing, I began asking myself profound questions: “What am I truly meant to do? How can I honor those we lost? What meaningful contribution can I make in this world?”
Reflection shifted my mindset from loss and despair to hope and purpose. It illuminated a clear path toward coaching and leadership development. I realized that I was uniquely equipped to guide others through their own moments of adversity, helping them uncover their potential, purpose, and direction.
Therefore, reflection is an invaluable leadership practice. It transforms our difficult moments into a compass guiding us toward meaningful impact.
3. Leadership Is Defined by Your Response
True leadership is revealed not when things are easy but precisely when everything feels impossible. Leaders cannot control every circumstance, but we always control how we respond.
My choice to run toward danger rather than away wasn’t heroic—it was an automatic response shaped by training, duty, and deeply held values. Yet, it was also a clear example of the principle that guides leadership at its highest level: courageously choosing to face difficulty head-on, supporting those around us, and demonstrating resilience under pressure.
As leaders, our responses ripple outward, setting the tone and creating the culture for our teams. Adversity doesn’t just test us individually; it also defines our collective identity and resilience.
Applying These Lessons to Leadership Today
These lessons aren’t isolated to the military—they apply to every context in which we lead. Whether in business, entrepreneurship, or personal life, our responses to adversity shape our success and define our legacy.
Leaders today face unprecedented uncertainty and complexity. We confront crises ranging from economic shifts to technological disruptions to cultural transformations. Each challenge, however daunting, offers an opportunity to lead through authenticity, resilience, and purpose.
When adversity arises:
- Lean into resilience, using challenges as growth opportunities.
- Make time for reflection, allowing your experiences to clarify your purpose.
- Respond with intention, understanding your actions set the example others will follow.
Inviting You to Reflect
As you consider your leadership journey, I encourage you to explore your turning points. Ask yourself:
- What moment or experience most profoundly shaped your leadership style and perspective?
- How has facing adversity made you stronger, clearer, or more purpose-driven as a leader?
- What core lessons have challenging experiences taught you, and how do you carry these forward today?
Sharing our turning points and lessons learned is powerful—it connects us, strengthens our collective leadership, and creates spaces for empathy, growth, and mutual support.
Gratitude Born from Adversity
Today, though the memory of November 12, 2016, remains vivid and painful, I’m grateful for how it shaped my path. Without that harrowing experience, I might not have discovered my passion for coaching and supporting leaders through their own complex journeys.
Adversity, though unwanted, brought profound clarity. My darkest day set me firmly on the path of helping others navigate uncertainty, embrace resilience, and lead with empathy and courage.
My hope in sharing this story is simple: may your most challenging moments also lead you toward your greatest purpose. May your turning points not merely test your resolve but reveal your greatest potential.
Jevon Wooden, CEO and Founder of BrightMind Consulting Group, is a speaker, trainer, certified coach, and business consultant. He specializes in empathetic leadership, emotional intelligence, and workplace culture. A U.S. Army veteran and Bronze Star recipient, Jevon is the author of From Functional to Phenomenal: The Entrepreneur’s Guide to Transforming Your Leadership and Business, where he introduces his 5Y Framework for clarity, confidence, and sustainable growth and Own Your Kingdom: How to Control Your Mindset, So You Can Control Your Destiny.
His work has been featured in Entrepreneur, Forbes, Inc. Magazine, and Fast Company.
